Hello pretties,
Oh my, it has been soooo long since I posted. I am so happy to be back with you my lovely readers and friends, missed ya’ lots. Life has been quite challenging with the passing of my Sister and the recent passing of my Dad. A loved one’s passing is a sad time, but a very busy time for you and your family as you plan for their homecoming. This isn’t a sad post, but I wanted to share some observations to help. As my Daddy always said, “You can’t stay here!” so all of us will go through this process and maybe someone will find these tidbits helpful.
On Losing A Loved One
1. Have a conversation with parents, siblings, aunts, etc. about final plans. Yes I know, don’t nobody want to talk about that stuff. But, believe me, it takes a load off of you and your family to know someone’s last wishes. For years, my sister and I wanted pink caskets, that’s just real talk. I felt good knowing we could honor her wishes. Have the talk and right it down – including wills and services.
2. People will offer all kinds of help, accept it!! One of my friends offered to cut my grass. I was raised to be a strong, independent woman, but when things like this happen, you need help and people want to help. Most women take care of everybody else, take the superwoman cape off and let folk take care of you. Made all the difference for me.
3. It is expensive – limos, dove releases, urns, flowers, programs, that stuff adds up. But don’t get stressed about these details. Remember tip #1? Well it helps with this tip because you would have had the conversation about the service, memorial or whatever your loved one wanted. Sticker shock averted.
4. Not everyone will be kind. This was a shocker for me. My phone was blowing up and many days I did not answer it. Most everyone understood and did not take it personally. They just kept calling and texting. I had one person to respond negatively, I addressed it and moved on. No time for other people’s stuff. Appreciate the folks that understand grief. They will keep calling and texting until you are ready!
5. There are no rules to grieving. Some days, you might cry all day. Some days you might go on as if things haven’t changed. Do YOU! Do not let anybody tell you how to grieve. For me, prayer and meditation have made the pain of loss easier to bear.
We are missing my Dad something awful. He was such a cool dude, for real. 100% straight shooter with a love of politics, history, music (#1 Ray Charles Fan), NASCAR, drag racing and most of all, The Corvette, America’s sport car. We will keep his memory in our hearts.
See, told you it would not be a sad post! Thank you so much for your condolences, very much appreciated. This is all part of the Cycle of Life that we all share.
I am back to a regular schedule of posting at least 3 times a week of fashion, home decor, travel and all kinds of stuff in between! And the 4th blogaversary for robincharmagne is right around the corner, look for some fun stuff.
Have a fab week pretties!
Linking with these lovely bloggers.
STACIE says
Sorry to hear about the loss of your father. You look just like him by the way. I know how it is. I lost my dad 3 years ago and I blogged when I was ready to. Don’t worry about us, just take care of you and your family. We’ll be here!
robi9832 says
Hey Stacie, thank you for sharing. I am so happy to be back at it!
Louida says
I’m sorry for your loss Robin. I know the feeling. When I lost my stepdad I was so heartbroken. But know he is smiling down at you always, and is there with you in spirit.
Make sure to take care of yourself and family.
Louida recently posted…A Little MAC Splurge: See What I Got
robi9832 says
Thank you Louida! Yes, definitely taking care of the family.
Gemma says
So sorry for your loss dear, it is the hardest thing you will ever go through.
Thinking of you.
Gemma x
Gemma recently posted…Autumn Floral Printed Dress
robi9832 says
Thank you Gemma for your kindness.
Neti says
Do you Sis and the rest will fall into place. Yes… your #1 tip is crucial. I am the resident planner of weddings & funeral in my family & they know me by first name at the funeral parlor. I have had to wrestle with family members about their departed so many times, because they could not agree on the final rites. So, I’m always encouraging my Aunts and cousins to write down their wishes and rarely they do. I lost my baby Sis 20+ years ago and still have my moments but the good memories always overshadow them. Just try to enjoy the good memories. Much Luv!
robi9832 says
Yessss Neti, it’s a hard conversation but it needed. Thank you for sharing!
Kelly says
You are so strong and you Dad sounds like a wonderful man. Thank you for sharing your struggles with us. You are very brave!
XOXO
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robi9832 says
Hi Kelly,
Thank you for the beautiful sentiment!
Renita says
Beautiful Soror! You are covered by angels. I know it was hard to write. But you are strong and will persevere. Remember, diamonds cut glass. And you are a diamond! Be Blessed! Call me if you need me.
robi9832 says
Soror you me misty eyed over here. Thank you for the support lady!
Lisa @ sororitylifetoarmywife says
I’m so sorry for your loss! Praying for you!
robi9832 says
Thank you so much Lisa!